January 24, 2002

I took a nap for the first time in a bit. For three hours...eek, kind of longer that I expected. Oh well. 4:30 to 7:30. I think my mum must have went to the movies cos...she's not home, haha. Ha.

...uh. The snow. Is very much melting away. It's sad as hell, I think. Small remnant remain, it's a horrible MONSTROSITY!...okay, perhaps not. At least it was cloudy/rainy/foggy today, that actually makes me a bit happy. Not that I enjoyed walking in the rain much, but eh. And that made the snow melt faster. Why is it in the 40-50 degree range anyway? It's still January right? Hm.

I don't remember doing much today. Okay, I'm not really thinking. Think...think...nothing worth reading about, I'd say. I slept during lunch again. It's weird though because I'm not really sleeping, but not really awake either. I'm in the middle somewhere, probably doing bad things to my brain. Well then. During English we had to write poems and I hated mine, so I didn't get anyone to make comments on it. Instead I wrote to myself. Forgot what I wrote. "Join a cult!" I think. I think I actually need to get someone to critique it though, but poems are so...I dislike poems. Well, maybe other people's are okay, but generally I don't liek to write em, they always sound fake and stupid and well, that's all I'll say for now. I hope I don't actually need someone to critique it or anything.

Yeah. And. I want walnuts. My mum bought some. She just got home. Bought food. Food isn't even that happy anymore....since my intestines, big and small, exploded (figuratively...if that even makes sense) and I KNOW I can't fast, because I guess I'm just no good at that. But she did buy some cookies. Sigh. Love cookies. Would like to suck the crap (literally) out of my system...although I guess it's more important to decrease the FAT content. Not sure how to do that. Haven't crossed the line into the world of EXERCISE yet. Probably won't. I'm really a quite not good person, I've realized, in many aspects, although sometimes I just have dumb arguements with my mum. Today we argued about water and food...somehow. The thing is I know what I'm saying is stupid, I know my mum knows what i'm saying is stupid, but my mum might not know that I know what i'm saying is stupid. Did you get all that? Hm. Just that when I come home from school I'm either in...a good mood..or...uh...the other one...actually, I have no idea. Maybe just not talking very much throughout the day builds up after a while...


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